[It isn't an instant fix, but it's clear Bucky relaxes exponentially with Sam's touch and a gentle kiss. He leans into the hold gently, one of his hands finding Sam's to tangle their fingers together as the other swipes down Bucky's face like it can wipe the traces of the day away.]
I thought...there had to be something. The tech here's no different from home, some of it's even worse, I figured it'd be a piece of cake to find what someone else hadn't. This isn't new. But I've spent almost every day since arriving here trying to crack this place open...and I can't.
[His grip tightened and there was a note of something edging into hysteria in his voice Twhen he spoke next.] I mean I literally can't. there's something else going on here, but every time I sit down to hack even the simplest fragment of data, it's like I'm just a dumb farm kid again and I can't do shit with a machine.
[He pressed a knuckle to his eye and let out a breath, his voice evening out again with some work from Bucky. He couldn't lose it to his frustration and fear. God, he had a lot of fear right now.]
I'm sorry, Sam. I wanted to find the way back home and get us there, I wanted to come back with something to make this easier. [And he was making it harder. Sam needed the familiarity of his friends and their home and their lives. What if Bucky wasn't enough to keep him together? What if Bucky wasn't enough alone to help in the long run? What if he ran off like he did today and left Sam alone to his head and the dregs of the Capitol that would probably never leave him and it just made things worse?
no subject
I thought...there had to be something. The tech here's no different from home, some of it's even worse, I figured it'd be a piece of cake to find what someone else hadn't. This isn't new. But I've spent almost every day since arriving here trying to crack this place open...and I can't.
[His grip tightened and there was a note of something edging into hysteria in his voice Twhen he spoke next.] I mean I literally can't. there's something else going on here, but every time I sit down to hack even the simplest fragment of data, it's like I'm just a dumb farm kid again and I can't do shit with a machine.
[He pressed a knuckle to his eye and let out a breath, his voice evening out again with some work from Bucky. He couldn't lose it to his frustration and fear. God, he had a lot of fear right now.]
I'm sorry, Sam. I wanted to find the way back home and get us there, I wanted to come back with something to make this easier. [And he was making it harder. Sam needed the familiarity of his friends and their home and their lives. What if Bucky wasn't enough to keep him together? What if Bucky wasn't enough alone to help in the long run? What if he ran off like he did today and left Sam alone to his head and the dregs of the Capitol that would probably never leave him and it just made things worse?
He needed to get Sam home.
But he couldn't.]